I am sitting on the train to Frankfurt. There is an old man opposite of me. He looks very messy and unclean. He has a really big belly and grey sweatpants. His scrotum seems michelangelesque, if Michelangelo's David was some trailer trash, beaten down, obese, old man. Meaning, it is very visible underneath the fabric. That is why I noticed. Nothing else. I also notice his balls are on his far right, both of them, while his penis is on the far left. Almost as if completely separated from one another. Almost as if he chopped them up in a fit of male-like rage and then, after regretting that impulse, hastily put them back together. But you can always tell when something was once broken. The vein in his forehead is throbbing, probably because it takes everything of him to keep his half-closed eyes opened, and the vein knows it. Even the vein is sick of his crap. It betrays him. It wants to break free. But who in the right mind would adopt this vein? The morning Sun makes some of hi...
Difficulty breathing. Fear. Sense of danger. Trembling. Lightheadedness. Sense of danger. Fear. Difficulty breathing. Fear. Sense of danger. Fear. Danger. Danger. Danger. Danger. I am trying to breathe. But its hard when your nose is stuffed, your mouth dry, the skin on your face hurts. Danger. The grounding technique. Danger. All I want is sleep. My head is being crushed. Swollen. Heart beats rapidly. I can hear it scream in my ears. The drums. I put my right hand on my chest. My therapist taught me that. I dont feel my heart under my hand. How can it be? I hear it, I feel it inside of me drumming, but I dont feel it under my hand. I check the pulse. Its there. 80 beats per minute. Pretty normal. I am still trying to locate my heart in my chest. Where did it go? I place my hand in the middle. I focus. Its not there. I move slightly to the left. Focus. Not there. I move further left. Focus. Not there. Upwards. Focus. Not there. I lost the heart. Its beating somewhere. Its just not...
I just watched a video of a man rescuing a cat from the city river. Somehow the cat got stuck inside the canal. I imagine it was raining heavily and suddenly, because there was a small cement outlay inside the river bank walls and that is where it found the ground to stay. The cat looked dry. That is why I imagine the river got bigger quietly. Or maybe the cat was just standing there for a long time and got dry. A man saw it and got the pool net to catch her. He extended the pool net towards the cat. The cat jumped into the water terrified of the net. It sensed danger. The net scared the cat. Understandably so. Imagine you cat-sized hiding inside the canal, water level rising, you know each minute its gonna get to you. Then as sudden as the misfortune you found yourself in, a long rod with the net twice your size attached to it appears from the above and starts approaching you. You never expect things to come at you from the sky. You are used to things coming out of the ground (fl...
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